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2 blunk 2 drog 2 day

So here it is, St. Patrick’s Day. I will get 8 hours of sleep now then follow up with 12 hours of patriotic drunkeness, a chicken baguette, taco fries and perhaps a row. I will then need a good 12 hours of near-comatose sleep coupled with extreme snoring, farting, etc. before I’m ready to face the world again.

If I’ve got my calculations correct, that should leave me with 30 minutes to wash the smell of drunken cunts off me, produce some searing-hot scutter, get dressed, drink coffee and then drive (erratically) into work for 8.30am Tuesday morning.

It may not be a great plan, but at least it’s realistic…