Big Breakfast
An elderly couple I know were looking to get a weekend away next month and since neither of them are computer literate or possess credit cards, they had asked me to find and book a two night stay (with breakfast) for them in a reasonable hotel in Wexford. I’ve been around this block a good few times and know that you can book the exact same hotel, for the exact same nights, yet get different prices on different online reservation websites. I don’t know why…
Anyway, I did a search and found that, at €128 per night, the Quality Hotel & Leisure Centre in Wexford was the cheapest by a long way. I was literally just about to click the ‘book now’ button when I happened to notice the room only rate: €71 per night.
I’m not much of a mathemetician, but it would appear that the privilige of eating their two breakfasts in this hotel will set this couple back a staggering €114, or €28.50 per breakfast. I can only imagine that this must be one of the finest breakfasts to be found in the country, a veritable early morning feast. Surely the sausages must be hand-made in their own kitchen by Nevin Maguire, the rashers carefully sliced from the rump of prize-winning pigs, the mushrooms and tomatoes picked from the Garden of Eden itself and the coffee beans brought directly from Colombia in a private jet flown by that smug bitch in the Kenco ads? The reality, I’d say, is that you’d get as good a breakfast, wrapped in a baguette, down at the local garage. Needless to say, that’s exactly what they’ll be doing.

We all know that Ireland is the land of the rip-offs, but this takes the fucking biscuit.









March 26th, 2008 at 12:40 am
Make sure and hyperlink a staggering €114, or €28.50 per breakfast so they’ll get the pingback and know what a crowd of twats you’re calling them.
March 26th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Nice idea Bock. Although it could backfire by giving them more business…
March 26th, 2008 at 8:37 pm
I could offer some reasons as to why they feel the need to charge so much for a breakfast, but that’s only because I work in the business. Having said that, I wouldn’t be paying that for a breakfast anywhere - except maybe if it was served by a topless waitress who wouldn’t charge any extra for a bit of rasher!
March 26th, 2008 at 8:47 pm
Topless breakfast waitresses? I think you’re onto something there Maxi, why not give it a trial run in your restaurant? Every builder this side of the Shannon would be eating there!
March 26th, 2008 at 9:11 pm
Hullo H.
Good to hear from you. Did you miss me? I bet you did. Well, truth is I missed all of you and I am feeling your love.
I have turned over a new leaf and promise to be good and never disagree with anything that is said ever again.
Could I be more contrite??
Bald Devil loves you all.
March 26th, 2008 at 9:26 pm
No need to apologise BD. It was a childish spat we all got involved in. Childish and fun.
March 27th, 2008 at 6:46 am
Thats the spirit H. Good to know there is still a sense of humour left out there. You are the man who put the H into humour.
Speaking of breakfast by the way. I hate those buffet style brekkies. I mean, watery scrambled eggs for fuck sake!! Agggh.
Cheers!
Bald Devil loves you all.